MY AMANDA... (Funningly Touching Story)

  MY AMANDA...

By: Asekhamhe Vinson Osikpemhi.

As I mature, I have grown to understand that every day is not the same. Surely everyone has that special day he/she cannot forget. For some of us there are days we can never forget; for me, Nov. 9^th, 2014, is one of those days.

I woke up to a Sunday of expectations going for early morning mass in my favourite Burberry shirt amidst compliments from numerous admirers- yes I have numerous admirers. What do you expect from a loyal handsome guy?

However, as a guy I had my hierarchy of female friends. Hence none of the compliments touched me the way Amanda’s compliment did. Amanda had been my 1^st crush in the University, my long time crush. In fact the length of my crush for her is longer than some people’s relationship. Yet I had endured. I was comfortable with the fact that She was my crush or I was her crush, anyway you like it! While people were proud of their girlfriends or partners, I was proud of my crush.

Her beauty defined my moments; anytime she stood inches close to me, my spirit knew unending peace and Joy. I was happy for no reason. She had a full dimple on her right cheek that I have always longed to poke; to dig as if there my heart lies.

So that morning when she came to me flashing that smile that had once made me hit my head against a pillar 6 months back, I shivered and comported myself, adjusting my already adjusted shirt.

“Sweetheart you look good, nice shirt”

“Chai!” I said to myself, blushing codedly.

I wished she meant it when she called me sweetheart. Was it real or just casual? If it was casual, then she had abused the word because I called her my sweetheart only when I was alone, during those personal moments when I would think of her before sleeping.

“Thank You dearie” I said cheerfully, slightly bowing my head.

I couldn’t face her, I was too shy to. That was the different in our “Crush-ship”.  While couples had confidence being with their partners, Amanda’s presence brought sweet uneasiness to me; the type that comes when you are 2 minutes from winning a football game.

The rest of the day was usual. In school I didn’t follow the normal law which says; “An Average Nigerian eats Rice on Sunday.” So after mass I ate the remaining pottage of Saturday night and laid on my bed listening to gospel jamz waiting for manna to fall.

At about 4pm, I was in a music concert when my phone vibrated. I shouldn’t have taken the call but the caller wasn’t like other callers- it was Amanda. I rushed out of the concert hall like one who was pressed, signaling to the ushers that I was about peeing on my body. She wanted me to accompany her to the market but I couldn’t. We just arrived at the concert so I couldn’t leave. She however agreed to get me some Carrot and Onions as I requested.

At about 7pm, she called again. MTN must have wondered why I happily answered this particular caller. She was back from the market and wanted me to come and get my “goods”. I came out happily after spraying my favourite “Happinex Body Spray” with the expectation of receiving a #100 worth of Carrot and Onions but I was wrong. She presented me a bag filled with fried rice ingredients and refused to collect a dime.  I was wowed and I immediately gave her a big fat hug without thinking about it and promised to cook fried  rice that night.

“Hope You’ll eat?” I asked happily.

“Yes” She replied, smiling gently.

That was it, my dream. This was a test of my crush for her. I dashed immediately to one of the stores at the back gate to get a kilo of chicken. Even though I was not financially buoyant at that time, I would do anything to please Amanda.

Beads of sweat filled my eyebrows as I cooked like I was in a cooking competition. To the surprise of my roommates, I used both corners of the room, making use of the two stoves.

I employed all the skills I had learnt from home, chopping the carrot and other ingredients carefully; all to please Amanda.

What else? My room was filled with Aroma as my roommates kept wondering what occasion the special meal was for.

In no time I was done- Fried rice, chicken and fried plantain. Just what Amanda liked. I packaged hers in a beautiful flask, one that I seldom used. At about 9:15pm, I called Amanda telling here I was done cooking and was on my way to her hostel. But she declined and said she was already full and felling sleepy.

What??? I pray oooo…. I begged her, convinced her and explained that I was already done and then she agreed to come out. I arrived her hostel and called her and she said she was coming. I waited though shy but anxiously happy to present to Amanda, a sign of my crush and fidelity- a faithful crusher I’ll become.

After about 15minutes, she sent me a text which read:

“Sweetheart, I’m sorry, I can’t come out again,

I’m tired and no one is willing to follow me out.

I’m sorry, see you tomorrow.

Just ike that??? Funny enough after reading the text,  her phone became switched off. NO! NO!! No!!!, I mumbled as I walked back to my hostel just like Lot without looking back. I got to my room still with my flask, to the surprise of my roommates who asked:

“Ah bros wetin happen now?

“Mstcheww:” I hissed.

“Make una chop jare” I angrily and slowly sai as I dropped the flask to those hngry lions like the ones in the bible that attacked Daniel’s enemies.

How on earth would I forget such a day?

Who dey follow Amanda laff???